HOW TO HAVE AN EFFECTIVE CONVERSATION ABOUT ABORTION IN YOUR COMMUNITY:

Do you avoid debating abortion and therefore don't speak at all publicly?
Does it feel uncomfortable to have public discussions about abortion?
Does the violence directed against abortion providers make you afraid to speak out?
Are audiences sick of the same tired rhetoric?
Are people in your community frustrated with conversations about abortion that don't say anything new?

It is possible to have lively discussions about abortion that transform the existing discussion. Many kinds of audiences (students, professional, religious, civic groups) welcome the opportunity to have open, honest conversations about abortion. If they were already "pro-choice", giving them good information and increased insight into the abortion experience will help be more committed to women's right to choose. If your audience is largely what is known as "the mushy middle", they will be able to clarify their thinking based on open and honest responses to their questions. Even audiences that have typically been opposed to abortion will find a respectful dialogue refreshing and may increase their compassion for those facing a difficult pregnancy decision.

Here are some elements of an open and honest conversation about abortion:

1. REAL LIFE. The best conversations are based on real life experience. We are not talking about abstract pronouncements of what is right and wrong but an understanding of the human experience.

2. SAFE SPACE. Speakers and audiences alike need to feel safe enough to explore difficult topics. No one should be exposed to personal attacks. See ground rules.

3. THE HARD QUESTIONS ARE THE BEST. Welcome those tough questions because they give you an opportunity to talk about the audience's unresolved feelings about abortion and bring to the discussion the real life situations that make the need for abortion clear.

4. BE OPEN. Openness comes from the heart. You can be open to all kinds of questions and opinions if you speak from your own experience and don't try to tell people what to think. Say, "In my experience,...." "What I hear women saying...." Embrace a range of feelings, experiences, and opinions.

5. BE HONEST. Not every question can be answered with a fact, but you can tell what you know from your experience and invite others to do the same. If you don't know, say so. Offer referrals to other sources of information.

6. OFFER RESOURCES. Always invite further exploration. A resource list of books, pamphlets, web links can help people keep the conversation going even after you leave.

7. GOOD AND BAD RESEARCH. Help audiences evaluate studies that seem to serve propaganda. Is it published in a "peer reviewed" scientific journal which looks at their methodology and conclusions? Has the finding been replicated? (In other words, has another study found the same thing?) Is the total number of subjects large enough to be meaningful? Who funded the study?

8. TALK GOES BOTH WAYS. Having a conversation involves speaking and listening. Asking and answering is important. Listening is essential. "Conversations" imply a certain amount of good will and mutuality, even when disagreeing.

9. DIFFERING VIEWS EXIST. We are not trying to tell people what to think. We are trying to encourage compassion, tolerance, and an appreciation of real life dilemmas. We want audiences to understand the diversity of perspectives and experiences that individuals can have when faced with an abortion.

10. WHAT DOES PRO CHOICE MEAN? If you don't think you can decide for someone else, then you are pro choice. Even if you are uncomfortable with some aspects of abortion you still want it to be an available option. Many people think of themselves as "pro life" if they don't think they could have an abortion themselves, but they don't want to make abortion illegal so that others can do what they decide is best. They, too, are pro choice! Unless you think you (or the government) can decide for someone else, you are pro choice.

Pro choice does not mean someone has had an abortion. In fact, a sizable percentage of women seeking abortion state that they "had always been against abortion" until they had to deal with a difficult decision about a pregnancy.

- DOWNLOADABLE PDF FILES THAT MAY ASSIST YOU IN COMMUNITY CONVERSATIONS -

1. Ground Rules -- A sample plan before you speak to a group.
2. HANDOUT -- How to have an effective conversation in your community
3. Course Outline -- sample outline for a college curriculum.